Holy EWCM!

Yup, TMI I know. Sorry about that!

But I have never had so many days in a row of EWCM during a medicated cycle. For the past cycles, I will usually get a some around stim day 6 for a few days. But this round, I have had it for the past 16 days in a row. 16 days. And not just a little! I blame it on the Estrogen priming, but let's just say I have plenty of panty liners on hand! LOL

Wow!

Transfer Day!

So, this morning was our embryo transfer. As I mentioned in previous posts, when they called Tuesday morning they said 3 out of the 4 had fertilized. So this morning, we were curious how many we'd have for our transfer today. DH was thinking 4, I was thinking 3. Well, neither of us was exactly quite right! haha

We still had 3, but one of them wasn't looking so hot anymore and they couldn't really tell if it was dividing any more or it was just hiding the other cells where the microscope couldn't see. I'm thinking it stopped dividing, but I'm no doctor! So we have at least 2 that did look good, and one, not so good. We decided to go for it and put all three back - figured it couldn't hurt!

Here's a picture of them (aren't they cute?!). I'll try and take a better one later, but at least it's a start. DH calls them stuffed mushrooms - and they do kind of look like that, don't they?! haha So from the picture, you can see the one that we're thinking really isn't doing well...

The transfer today actually took longer and hurt more than last time. Not sure why, but it did. Not a lot, but the speculum hurt/was uncomfortable, putting the catheter into my cervix caused some cramping, etc... Nothing was unbearable, but it was definitely more noticeable than last time. I guess I'll take it as a sign since last time didn't work?! lol

OK, guess that's it for now. My mom called last night and today to wish us luck. I am so happy I finally told her - she has been so supportive. She even offered to take time off of work should I ever need it and DH can't drive me or go with me. How sweet is that?!

I took other pics of the retrieval and transfer that I'll try and post later, but for now, I'm off to take a nap. And then bake some cookies - you want any? ;-)

2dpR?

OK, so I made that up - 2 days past Retrieval. Yup, I'm a dork - but I thought it was a pretty good way to describe it. So our 3 day transfer is tomorrow at 10:15. Can't wait!

We've spent the last couple days just hanging out. We took the boat out (Tom fished and I read and relaxed in the sun!), went for walks, grilled, had dinner with a friend yesterday, etc... Not sure yet what we're going to do the rest of the week to and the last few days of our vacation. Maybe a quick trip up to Lake George or something, I don't know. Just something relaxing and vacation-y - guess we'll see. As long as it helps me take my mind off the dreaded 2ww, I'm good!

As far as side effects go, I'm still bloated, but the ovaries haven't hurt as much as they have the last couple days. They didn't hurt yesterday morning, but by the end of the day they started aching - I've learned I probably shouldn't lay on my belly to read while in the boat - oops! Either way, much better today - bring on the transfer!

So what do you think? Are all 3 embies still kicking? Or did we lose one? Or did the 4th one catch up? I'll let you know tomorrow!

Fert Report, Kitty, and Plans for Today

Hey there! Got our Fertilization Report this morning. Out of the 9 eggs they retrieved, they were able fertilize 4 of them. They weren't able to tell me why they couldn't do the others, but I'm assuming they either weren't mature or something - will have to find out Thursday when I get to the Transfer. And of the 4 eggs they got, 3 of them had fertilized this morning. She said the 4th may catch up by Thursday, but at least, as of now, we have 3 - so that's a good start!

It's actually very similar to last time - last time we got 10 eggs, they injected 4, and 3 fertilized! lol

So we have a 3 day transfer scheduled for this Thursday at 10:15. Can't wait! And it was nice of them to push it out by a couple hours compared to last time since we have to travel 2 hours to get there. Woohoo!

Here's my list of drugs:

- Prometrium (200 mg) - vaginal supps 2x daily (oh so messy!)
- Estrace (2 mg) - orally 2x daily
- Doxycycline (100 mg) - 2x daily for 3 days
- Baby Aspirin (81 mg) - 1 daily
- PNV - 1 daily
- B6 - 1 daily
- Levothyroxin (25 mcg) - 1 daily
- And then I add in a multi-vitamin 1 daily.

As far as symptoms/side effects, they are better today. Yesterday I was extremely bloated, ovaries hurt to walk, move, etc... although it wasn't so bad that I couldn't handle it. And I was stuck "taking it easy" lol. Nice when you don't HAVE to do it, but boring when you do ;-) Needless to say it's worth it and I spent much time on the Nest and watching TV.

Today the bloating is down so far and the ovaries aren't nearly as achy. We are now getting ready to take the boat out for a couple hours - I am on vacation after all! - and then I'm meeting a friend tonight for dinner to celebrate. My fert report and her divorce finally being finalized!

Lastly - in case anyone is curious about the kitty, there hasn't been much change. He is still losing weight but we are still doing the force feedings. Just don't always get him to keep them down. But we're still trying. And, on that note, I'm off to go feed him again, let him outside, and then pack up to head out on the boat!

I hope everyone has a great day and I'll talk to you soon!

Day 6 of Stims, My Cat, and the Olympics

Today is day 6 of stims and tonights Lupron shot hurt like crazy! I got more Lupron at Monday's ultrasound appointment and the needle I used tonight from the Lupron kit hurt like crazy! Don't know why, but it went in hard - ouch! Follistim pen was once again, no pain at all. Hope the rest of the needles won't hurt like tonights!

So my first ultrasound on Monday and saw a decent amount of follies. Only one was measurable at Monday's appointment, but based on the fact that I could start feeling my ovaries today (and tons of EWCM!), I should have some more to measure during my appointment tomorrow (Wednesday).

Have been getting a lot of headaches and have been just so tired lately. Don't know if it's the Lupron or my lack of drinking water, crappy eating and staying up late to watch the Olympics. Probably both!

Speaking of Olympics, I'm watching right now. It's currently the Women's Gymnastics - Balance Beam event final. I already know who wins, but it's still exciting to watch. Despite all the talk out there, especially around gymnastics, the Olympics have been fun to watch. Michael Phelps, the women's beach volleyball, Shawn Johnson and Nastia Liukin for gymnastics, etc... I've even found myself enjoying diving (even synchronized diving!) and want to watch the Rhythmic gymnastics on Friday. Go USA!

I guess my last update is on my cat. I know some of you have asked, and I thank you for that. There really isn't much of a positive update. He still refuses to eat on his own and shows no interest. Therefore we still have to force-feed him with the syringe. Which he hates. It absolutely breaks my heart every time I have to do that. He now basically fears when I approach him. He used to love it knowing he's get a nice scratch - not being tortured with food and then me having to wipe his face because of the food that doesn't make it into his mouth. So now he anticipates it every time he sees me go near him and starts to freak out most of the time. I made DH do it today for most of the feedings because I couldn't bear to do that to him again.

But if we don't do that, he will continue to just get worse. As it is, even when we do manage to get his pill and food down his throat, he throws it up about 50% of the time. It just makes me so sad. He's just continuing to get worse. We are beginning to think to ourselves that he may not live that much longer. And because of that, we've even begun letting him go outside on his own. He might as well enjoy however much time he has left, you know? So he has free reign of the outdoors again and can do what he loves best - hanging out in our neighbor's yard filled with flowers, and plants, a few gardens, and a fish pond. He's in heaven! And we know for a fact he's not going hear the road again - he's scared of it! Poor guy (although that does make me happy!). Some people may criticize us for letting him back out where he could get hurt, etc... Where he got hurt the first time. But we don't care - we just want him to be happy considering his current circumstances, and that is what does it. So outside he goes during the day, and snuggling inside at night with us! We love you Riley!

7dp3dt

Well - it's officially been a week since our ET and we are figuring our little embabies are about 4,096 cells now? Does that make sense? They were 16 celled on the day of the ET and should be doubling every day, right? Or do I have that wrong? haha So one week of the 2WW has come and gone and we are now just waiting patiently for our beta on Friday.

We were happy to be away last week (see below) because it kept us busy and helped to keep our mind off things - we even chatted with friends of ours who tried for almost two years before finally being pregnant - so it was nice to be able to tell someone in real life.

But, despite how busy we tried to keep ourselves, you can bet any amount of money you want that it still hasn't stopped us/me from reading into every little thing - both positive and negative. For example - every time I feel a cramp or something in the area of my uterus I think - ooh, maybe it's the babies! Although sometimes I'm like crap - pregnancy and period signs are so similar - maybe it's just my period coming - or maybe it's the meds causing it.

Or with my boobs - they still hurt, but not as much - so I think well, maybe this didn't work. But then I remind myself, not everyone has the same symptoms - and plus, there's still time for them to hurt again!

So I don't know - we just have our fingers crossed that everything is pointing in the direction of a BFP this Friday. If it doesn't work, we'll start again with cycle #2, but now we're trying to stay relatively positive. I talk to them a lot, rub my lower abdomen, and every night and morning we make sure to kiss my uterus area three times - one for each little embaby.

If anyone wants to see, I took a picture of the picture they gave us of our little embabies on the day of the ET - aren't they beautiful?!






I think they are beautiful, but I may be a little biased. Wish us luck!

Feeling Much Better

So I freaked out a little yesterday. But I just had such a hard time believing that there were only four mature eggs - I still do. If this round doesn't work, there will be a lot of questions asked at the WTF appointment. DH and I both discussed that if, for some reason, this round doesn't work, we'll definitely try a second round.

In all honesty, this really hasn't been as tough as I thought. Sure, it's kind of uncomfortable when I'm "full" of eggs, and sometimes I feel like I could just cry/scream, but really, it's all been pretty manageable. I could definitely do it again. It would be a whole lot easier if my insurance covered it all instead of paying out-of-pocket, but we'd definitely do it again.

But for now, I'm not thinking about next cycle. I'm thinking about this one. That we're still in the game. I called the RE's office this morning and the answering service had someone called me back. We discussed my concerns about only having two and that they might die between yesterday and Monday. And that we have to drive two hours just to get there. That if there was any way to find out how they're doing or to call us before we leave to save the drive if, in case, none of our little embies were still living.

She assured me (sort of!) that they should still be ok for Monday and to still come out. They don't check them again until about 8:00 Monday morning. She said that they gave us an early appointment for that reason and said that there was one girl who had an 11:15 appointment that is also driving and they told her to call first because hers didn't look that good. They didn't tell us that, so to just come on out.

I'm not sure how much I believe that if they were good yesterday, they'll still be good by Monday, but I guess I just have to put my faith in the RE's hands. And if we end up making a two hour trip for no reason, then we'll just have to deal with that when the time comes.

So, like I said, I'm trying to be positive right now. It's a lot easier than yesterday after hearing the news. That was NOT a good time. But, DH and I talked about it, we spent the afternoon out on the boat and went to see some 4th of July fireworks last night in a town where he used to live. And yup, I know it's a week early - they always do them early since we live in the capital of NYS and they always have a huge display on 4th, so they do it early so as to not compete. So much easier to go see these - not nearly as many people!

Although - there were definitely some characters there last night. I think I have seen my share of mullets, liquor/NASCAR/Harley t-shirts, women without bras that should NOT be without a bra, and feathered/hairsprayed hair to last me the rest of the year. It definitely made for some good people watching before the fireworks started! That, and I got my fried dough - yum!

Today we have some errands to do - I've finally updated my ER entry (below), I have to get new tires on my car, clean the house, make some bread, make some cookies, and pack for tomorrow.

I also made a vet appointment for Riley for tomorrow after we get back since he is STILL vomiting and has now scratched himself raw above his scapula. We were going to leave for Rochester right after the RE appointment since it's only 1-1.5 hours further, but we couldn't bring the cat with us and leave him in the car. And we wanted to get him into the vet once again. So we'll probably head out Tuesday morning to Rochester instead.

I hope whomever is reading this has a great day - and thanks for reading!

Egg Retrieval

Well - today was a day full of nervousness, excitement, waiting, and laughs.

It takes about two hours to get to Syracuse (since we're on grant, have to go to the "Mother" office rather than our local office which is only 10 minutes away) so we got up around 7:15 and left around 8:40 for our 11:15 appointment. I'd rather be early than late! Ride was pretty uneventful although it sucked seeing Tom eat when I couldn't - I was starving!

We get there around 10:40, go in, fill out paperwork and wait. And wait some more. And wait some more. Apparently they had a lot of IVF's that morning so we didn't get to go in until 12:20 - yikes!

While we were waiting, Tom goes out to grab an another apple to eat and he notices we have a flat tired. Oops! That sucks. So the whole time we're waiting I have to try and get his mind off wanting to go and get it fixed, because who knows when they'll call us in! Knowing our luck, they would have called us while he was gone - that wouldn't have been cool!

They call our name and take us back. They take Tom to the room for him to get dressed in his nice little outfit and me to the bathroom to change into mine. Very cute, if I have to say so myself! haha

They get me all hooked up and started giving us the low down of what pills they're giving me for after and what's going to happen to the procedure. Thanks to the girls on the nest (especially Shawna!) not much of it was a surprise. The doctor comes in, introduces himself and then heads out to go get ready. Anesthesiologist then comes in and starts explaining what he'll be doing.

I ask one of the nurses to take a picture, and they were all for it, thankfully - love it! They even start joking about all the fun pictures they can take while I'm under lol

Anesthesiologist administers his magic potion, I can start to feel it, and not too long later I'm out - such a nice little nap! DH takes quite a few pictures while I'm under - they said they had never had anyone take pictures before and they were loving it - suggesting pictures he could take, even getting him to take a picture of the ultrasound screen.

When I woke up, I guess I just started asking lots of questions - and apparently repeatedly since I wasn't quite awake enough and didn't remember what I asked - whoops! But they were good, though, and answered all of my questions - every time. Overall, I guess the whole procedure took 5 minutes and I was out another 5 before I woke up. It's such a fast process.

Once we were done, they had me get dressed while DH went out to call AAA for the flat tire. And while we were waiting for them to show up, the nurses were so awesome. They know I hadn't eating since the night before and here it was almost 2:00 - so they took us both into their kitchen and fed us. How awesome is that! They had sandwiches, wraps, salad, brownies, etc... We ended up having a chicken salad wrap, soda, and a brownie (or maybe it was a couple brownies - they were goooood!). Gotta love drug reps for bringing the free food. But even more for the nursing staff to be so incredibly nice and letting us join them for lunch!

AAA finally arrived and couldn't fix the tire, but did put on the spare and directed us to a tire place to see if they could do anything, or get a new one. DH comes in to get me and we set off for the tire place. And here is where DH turned into a typical male - the directions the AAA guy gave us were wrong - and instead of stopping by and asking one of the many auto-type places to ask for directions, he just keeps driving. And driving. So what could have been 10-15 mins had he been willing to stop and ask for directions took over 45 minutes. So frustrating! But, in the end, we found it, they miraculously patched the tire, and we were on our way home - yay!

As far as the recovery goes, I wasn't honestly in a lot of pain. I was a bit drowsy and had some period-like cramps and could take Tylenol if I wanted (nothing else, though - I guess the others thin out your lining?), but they honestly weren't bad enough to take anything.

Got home, we ate dinner, went for ice cream (yum!) and just hung out for the rest of the night. I ended up passing out on the bed without realizing it, but did wake up in the middle of the night to take my billion pills and a picture of my very bloated belly.

Before:

After (so bloated!)

Now let's just hope this bloated belly sticks around and becomes a pregnant belly, right? Can't wait for the fertilization report - hopefully it's good!

I Can't Button My Pants!

Yikes! I always knew bloat came with the territory for trigger/ER/ET, but I guess I just never let it sink it that it would happen this early. So I'm sitting here at work with my pants unbutton, sore boobs, tired, and patiently counting the hours until I can leave! I have tomorrow and all of next week off, so I can't wait to just not have to be at work, let alone the anticipation of the ER and ET!

And oh yeah - I can definitely still feel those ovaries in there - keep on chugging!

Triggered!

I made it to 11:45 and the trigger has been injected! Woohoo! Sub-Q shot like the rest, so was very easy (plus, it was pre-filled!). There's on turning back now I guess, eh? ;-)

OK, I'm off to bed, I'm exhausted. Night!

Stim Ck #3 - It's a go!

The ER is a go for Friday! At 11:15 am to be precise. They re-measured today and everything looks awesome. And I knew going into this that were were some positive growth in there - it is even more uncomfortable now - I can feel them all the time - and standing up/walking can be downright painful! haha

But, here are the updated measurements:

Left Ovary:
22.0
20.6
20.0
17.4
15.3
12.4

Right Ovary:
20.6
18.7
17.3
16.3
15.6
12.0
11.8

So not too many in the 18-22 range yet, but hopefully a few more will sneak in that range by Friday when they take them all out. So here's my protocol for the next few days:

Tonight: no stims, no Lupron, no aspirin (which I've been taking to thin blood to prevent clotting, etc...). Trigger the follicle release with Ovidrel injection at 11:45 pm. They retrieve the eggs 36 horus after the trigger, so that's why so late at night. Just hope I can stay up that late - I've been pretty tired lately.

Tomorrow: shot free day! Just no food/liquids after midnight

Friday: drive to Syracuse for the ER. Still no food. Also, no jewelry, watches, nail polish, contacts, anything that smells, wear comfy clothes

• DH gives his fresh sample and they inject into the good eggs. Speaking of which, I'm happy I confirmed with them today that his frozen samples would be sent to Syracuse. They hadn't yet! So they will be personally driven to Syracuse with the doctor today. Phew!

Saturday: they call with the fertilization report

Sunday - Wednesday: sometime in here, assuming we still having living embro's, they will transfer some back in!

OMG I am so frickin' excited. Nervous and excited. I am excited to get this show on the road and to get me pregnant (hopefully!). But I'm also nervous something may go wrong. That None of the eggs will be good. That in all of the samples that DH has given (Friday's fresh or past frozen) that none of the sperm acan be used. That none of them fertilize. That none of them make it to transfer. Or that if they do, none stick or I miscarry.

Ugh. I just need to keep being positive. I know I have to keep some of the reality thoughts in there that something may go wrong so it's not a huge crash if it does, but for my own sanity right now, I need to keep thinking positive thoughts, so wish us luck! POSITIVE THOUGHTS!

And if they don't, in the amazing words of my husband last night when we were talking about this: If this cycle, or none of our future cycles work, we will always have each other. And that's something I will always cherish.

I love my husband so much!

Ovaries - I have them!

Yikes - let's just say I can DEFINITELY tell I have ovaries right now and they are very, very full of the lovely follies I'm growing! It used to be that I could sort of feel them when I walked or stood up. Now, I can feel them just sitting here, when I stand up it's actually kind of painful and definitely uncomfortable. And with every step, it's like someone's hitting me in each ovary- left, right, left.... So I think I am definitely on track for Friday! lol

Stim Check #2!

Went in today for Stim Check #2 and so far, so good - we are still on track for the ER to be this Friday - THIS FRIDAY! Yay! Actually saw a doctor this time. In the past, it's usually one of the nurses who draws the blood, does the ultrasound, etc... The only time I had seen an actual doctor was at the HSG/SHG. Not that I mind - the nurses are great. I was just curious if the only time I'd see them was at an actual procedure! lol


But nope, saw one today. He did the actual measuring. He only measured the top 5 on each side - the others were small, so I'm guessing he didn't bother measuring those. He said my lining is looking great, too! Here are the measurements as of this morning (mm):


Left: 16.2, 16.1, 14.8, 12.2, 11.3

Right: 17.7, 15.4, 13.6, 12.2, 12.1


Not bad - they're getting there! They kept me on the same Follistim and Lupron protocol and I go back on Wednesday morning for my next check. Honestly? I can't wait!


I look forward to each each time to see how things are progessing. They asked me today how things were going and how I was feeling. I told them I actually like doing the shots - makes me feel empowered - like I'm actually doing something about it, you know? Does that make sense? Although I do have to admit my belly is getting a little sore from the injections - to the touch. I think I need to vary up my locations more than I do. I've got some nice bruises and needle prick marks in this belly of mine! My latest Lupron actually resulted in a nice little bump - it eventually went away, but it was pretty funky to see!





The biggest, and honestly, the only side effect I really have right now is I can feel my ovaries. With every step I take, when I go to the bathroom, when I sit down, etc... I can feel them. I sometimes feel this when I am on a regular cycle, but not nearly this much. I can definitely tell I'm growing a bunch of follies in there! It's kind of a sharp ache in each location - not really sure how to describe it. Kind of annoying/uncomfortable, but nothing painful by any means. Guess we'll see how I feel in another day or so when they're even bigger!


Speaking of bigger - I know they want the follies to be between 18-22 mm for the trigger. But I honestly never stopped to think about how big that really is. I tracked down a metric ruler today at work just to see for myself. Definitely bigger than I realized! And to combine that with about 14-16 of them in there? No wonder I can feel them and girls feel full/heavy at the end! haha


OK, guess that's it for now. Time for bed. In case you haven't noticed, I pretty much ramble and type as I "speak it' - don't really supress any of it - so if you've made it this far, nice job!

Some side effects...

Lupron Day 12. As I think I've mentioned previously, I've been really lucky as far as side effects so far. Some of the symptoms of Lupron are headaches, tiredness, moody, etc... And I've felt each of those, but i can't guarantee it's from Lupron and not others. For example - I often get headaches - usually due to lack of water, old contacts, staring at a computer all day and stress. I've been tired and moody, but I've also been under a lot of stress at work and more so in caring for my cat - and not sleeping much at night until recently as I've had to get up throughout the night to check on him. So who knows - they could be side effects of Lupron, or of everyday life!

But, there are some side effects that are definitely from the Lupron - although minor. For one, I've had a bit of bruising - I'm thinking it's from one of the times in the beginning where we pinched the skin really hard for the needle - oops!

And then every once and a while, after an injection, I get red and itchy at the injection site and a little bump - not sure if it's fluid or just from the injection.

Doesn't last long - 20 mins, maybe? I have to admit I kind of like it when it does happen - kind of makes me feel like this is real and something is really happening, you know? Especially since other (possible?!) side effects have been so minor. Yay for that!