We love you, Riley!

Last night after we brought Riley back home after his appointment, we wanted to make sure he enjoyed his last night. So we spent some time outside, played string, and had lots and lots of window time and petting! We didn't do any force feedings last night - we wanted his last few hours to be enjoyable for him, not torture. He even purred - a LOT - last night when we were petting him. It was so nice to hear and to know he was happy.

This morning, I got up early so we could spend just a few more hours together. There was lots of petting again and of course the cheek rubbing. ;-)

And then the strangest thing happened. This morning, we still had the carrier out out and open from the night before. Usually, for obvious reasons, he hates that thing and we have to fight him to get into it. Well, about 10 minutes before we had to leave, Riley comes out of the bedroom, drinks some water, and then just walks right into his carrier and lays down. It was so strange - like he knew what was going on and had accepted it. Or at least that's what we like to think.

The office was really busy since it was a Saturday morning (including a huge, beautiful Great Dane!) so it took a while to get into the room. But once we got in, we had to fill out the necessary paperwork including what we wanted to do with his remains. We chose cremation and to get his ashes back, which we'll get in about a week from Tuesday.

They explained the process and it went very smoothly and peacefully. Basically, they gave him a shot that puts him to sleep, but still breathing, even though his eyes stay open. It took affect pretty quickly and we just kept petting him and talking to him as best we could through fighting back the tears. And then once he's asleep, they shave his leg and inject the final injection that officially stops his heart. That part happens so fast it was pretty amazing - and i'm so thankful that he just kept "sleeping". I know sometimes there are "side effects" to it and I'm thankful he just kept laying there. It was almost like he was just napping and that made it easier to see.

DH and I, of course, were both crying - and believe it or not, the vet actually was tearing up at the end as well when she gave me the hug. Riley had become quite popular there due to all of his visits and grew on everyone, so it made me happy that he had touched their lives as well.

So now DH and I are just kind of hanging out around the house - watching TV, napping, etc... to get our mind off of it. We haven't put his things away yet - we couldn't. But know we will neeed to, soon. And tonight, we are going to a BBQ at a friends' house to get us out of the house.

Thank you all for your thoughts and wishes - both on here and on the Nest. It really means a lot. And to leave you, I'm going to re-link to one of my old posts with some of our favorite pictures of Riley.

http://tinyurl.com/5jxdxp


Riley - Mommy and Daddy will miss you and love you always - you were a huge part of our family and always will be. Now you can play with as much string, nap, and chase as many animals as you want - MUAH!

Putting Riley down tomorrow

This is a straight copy & paste from my post on the Nest - sorry about that - but I just can't get myself to write it again. I may add something more later, and some pictures...

After today's vet visit, it was decided that we are going to put him down tomorrow morning at 10:30. This all stemmed from when he got hit by the car the day after Memorial Day. He was in really bad shape then, but the biggest concern was his right front leg. They didn't think he'd ever be able to use it again and would have to amputate it. Other than that, he was doing ok. He was eating, etc... They were suprised he didn't have any head trauma that they could see considering where he took the brunt of the accident.Then, just one day he started vomiting every time he ate. They did ALLLLL sorts of tests and EVERYTHING on him (and some a fellow Nestie (a vet) even suggested!) and on all sorts of medicine - but everything looks good. He did end up stopping the vomiting every time, but after a while he just stopped eating all together. Not even the faintest interest in his favorite foods. They're thinking when he got hit, perhaps there was damage done to his hunger drive or something in his brain? We just don't know.

So we have had to force feed him lately with a syringe. And that was complete torture on the little guy - he hated it. But at least it was something - even though he was throwing up some of that, too.So the last couple of days we noticed he had jaundice - pretty bad. So we took him in and the vet confirmed it - and that his liver pretty much isn't working anymore. He has gone from about 19 pounds down to 10 and he is just so not himself anymore. Doesn't do anything he used to love and pretty much just sits in one spot or hides in the bathroom or under the bed all day.

So even though it's going to be so hard on us tomorrow, I do truly know it's for the best. Starving to death and liver failure isn't a way I'd want to see him to go. I'd rather him just "go to sleep".

Oh - and the kicker? The leg they thought we'd have to amputate? Healed just fine and he can walk on it no worries. Who would have guessed the eating would have been the issue... Go figure, eh?

And on a related note, I think if I have to lose one special life tomorrow, I think it's only fair that this IVF works and I gain another. Right? Wishful thinking, I know - but it seems like it's only fair to me...

OK - I know this got long, I just needed to get it out. Thanks everyone for listening.

Riley has Jaundice

We were looking at him last night while feeding him and his nose, ears, etc... are all pretty yellow. So we're assuming he has fatty liver and jaundice from the not eating. Poor guy. So we are going to see if we can take him to the vet today and see what they say.

He's been spending most of his time inside either hiding in the bathroom on the towel or under the bed. It's weird. We've started shutting the bedroom doors so he couldn't go under the beds - he usually stays on top and looks out the window, but he has only been doing that for a little while now before going under. I think he think's it's his way of him hiding so we can't forcefeed him, but we end up getting him out anyway. We could be wrong since that explanation wouldn't fit the bathroom, so I don't know for sure. Maybe he just wants a small dark place?

OK, guess that's it for now. As far as how I'm feeling, not too bad. Can feel the ovary/uterus area and was pretty bloated yesterday, but not so bad right now. I'm sure the bloating will come back as the day progresses, though - never fear! ;-)

Transfer Day!

So, this morning was our embryo transfer. As I mentioned in previous posts, when they called Tuesday morning they said 3 out of the 4 had fertilized. So this morning, we were curious how many we'd have for our transfer today. DH was thinking 4, I was thinking 3. Well, neither of us was exactly quite right! haha

We still had 3, but one of them wasn't looking so hot anymore and they couldn't really tell if it was dividing any more or it was just hiding the other cells where the microscope couldn't see. I'm thinking it stopped dividing, but I'm no doctor! So we have at least 2 that did look good, and one, not so good. We decided to go for it and put all three back - figured it couldn't hurt!

Here's a picture of them (aren't they cute?!). I'll try and take a better one later, but at least it's a start. DH calls them stuffed mushrooms - and they do kind of look like that, don't they?! haha So from the picture, you can see the one that we're thinking really isn't doing well...

The transfer today actually took longer and hurt more than last time. Not sure why, but it did. Not a lot, but the speculum hurt/was uncomfortable, putting the catheter into my cervix caused some cramping, etc... Nothing was unbearable, but it was definitely more noticeable than last time. I guess I'll take it as a sign since last time didn't work?! lol

OK, guess that's it for now. My mom called last night and today to wish us luck. I am so happy I finally told her - she has been so supportive. She even offered to take time off of work should I ever need it and DH can't drive me or go with me. How sweet is that?!

I took other pics of the retrieval and transfer that I'll try and post later, but for now, I'm off to take a nap. And then bake some cookies - you want any? ;-)

2dpR?

OK, so I made that up - 2 days past Retrieval. Yup, I'm a dork - but I thought it was a pretty good way to describe it. So our 3 day transfer is tomorrow at 10:15. Can't wait!

We've spent the last couple days just hanging out. We took the boat out (Tom fished and I read and relaxed in the sun!), went for walks, grilled, had dinner with a friend yesterday, etc... Not sure yet what we're going to do the rest of the week to and the last few days of our vacation. Maybe a quick trip up to Lake George or something, I don't know. Just something relaxing and vacation-y - guess we'll see. As long as it helps me take my mind off the dreaded 2ww, I'm good!

As far as side effects go, I'm still bloated, but the ovaries haven't hurt as much as they have the last couple days. They didn't hurt yesterday morning, but by the end of the day they started aching - I've learned I probably shouldn't lay on my belly to read while in the boat - oops! Either way, much better today - bring on the transfer!

So what do you think? Are all 3 embies still kicking? Or did we lose one? Or did the 4th one catch up? I'll let you know tomorrow!

Fert Report, Kitty, and Plans for Today

Hey there! Got our Fertilization Report this morning. Out of the 9 eggs they retrieved, they were able fertilize 4 of them. They weren't able to tell me why they couldn't do the others, but I'm assuming they either weren't mature or something - will have to find out Thursday when I get to the Transfer. And of the 4 eggs they got, 3 of them had fertilized this morning. She said the 4th may catch up by Thursday, but at least, as of now, we have 3 - so that's a good start!

It's actually very similar to last time - last time we got 10 eggs, they injected 4, and 3 fertilized! lol

So we have a 3 day transfer scheduled for this Thursday at 10:15. Can't wait! And it was nice of them to push it out by a couple hours compared to last time since we have to travel 2 hours to get there. Woohoo!

Here's my list of drugs:

- Prometrium (200 mg) - vaginal supps 2x daily (oh so messy!)
- Estrace (2 mg) - orally 2x daily
- Doxycycline (100 mg) - 2x daily for 3 days
- Baby Aspirin (81 mg) - 1 daily
- PNV - 1 daily
- B6 - 1 daily
- Levothyroxin (25 mcg) - 1 daily
- And then I add in a multi-vitamin 1 daily.

As far as symptoms/side effects, they are better today. Yesterday I was extremely bloated, ovaries hurt to walk, move, etc... although it wasn't so bad that I couldn't handle it. And I was stuck "taking it easy" lol. Nice when you don't HAVE to do it, but boring when you do ;-) Needless to say it's worth it and I spent much time on the Nest and watching TV.

Today the bloating is down so far and the ovaries aren't nearly as achy. We are now getting ready to take the boat out for a couple hours - I am on vacation after all! - and then I'm meeting a friend tonight for dinner to celebrate. My fert report and her divorce finally being finalized!

Lastly - in case anyone is curious about the kitty, there hasn't been much change. He is still losing weight but we are still doing the force feedings. Just don't always get him to keep them down. But we're still trying. And, on that note, I'm off to go feed him again, let him outside, and then pack up to head out on the boat!

I hope everyone has a great day and I'll talk to you soon!

Egg Retrieval & Funny Story!

So today went well. We left around 7:45 this morning and headed to Syracuse. Got there just in time and then shortly after, they took us back. It was uncomfortable sitting in the car straight up and down the last couple of days (gotta love giant ovaries!) so I had to recline, but other than that, not too bad. Just achy ovaries - they even hurt a bit with each step - fun, fun! I find myself hold my hands over them - quite the picture, I have to imagine!

We both got changed into our beautiful outfits and then they hooked me up to all my IV's, etc... And this time they hooked the IV up to my arm where they normally draw blood, not my hand - the hands hurts!

And before I know it, I'm awake and they had retrieved 9 eggs. Last time they told me when I'd be put out, but not this time I guess! lol

I don't even remember the doctor coming in! DH took lots of pictures - might post them later after I get them off the camera. He also said that they got 9 eggs and there's a chance that 6 of them are mature. I sure hope so - that's better than I was expecting!

We stopped at a Thai place for lunch and then drove the 2 hours home. I'm a little tired, and the ovaries are achy, but nothing I can't deal with. So now we wait for tomorrow morning's fert report - hoping it's a good number!

And now, here's the funny story:

So on the way to the Retrieval this morning, my husband drove. Fast. And before he could slow down, a State Trooper pulled out, put on his lights, and pulled us over. Oops!

Expecting him to come to the driver's side, I hear a knocking on my passenger window and all of a sudden, there he was. And here's the conversation:

Mr. Policeman: License and Registration please
Mr. Marcy: hands info to me to hand to cop
Mr. Policeman: Do you know why I pulled you over?
Mr. Marcy: yes - I was going over the spead limit - well over 80
Marcy: thinking to herself - don't say WELL OVER, just stick to - "yes, I was speeding"
Mr. Policeman: yes, I clocked you going 82. Where are you coming from.
Mr. Marcy: Albany
Mr. Policeman: And where are you headed?
Mr. Marcy: We're headed to Syracuse to the Fertility Clinic

And now, get this part:

Mr. Policeman: Oh, my wife and I have fertility issues. I understand. Go ahead, just slow down.
Mr. and Mrs. Marcy: - thank you Officer, thank you!

Can you believe it? That was it. Without another word he handed us back the license and registration and we pulled away (going speed limit for the rest of the way!).

How lucky are we and how cool of that cop?! Such a small world...

Upstate NY Nestie GTG!

So yesterday was the big Upstate NY Get-together and it was so much fun! Upstate NY basically runs from Albany to Buffalo to Binghamton and all points north (since they don't have a Northern NY board). So we don't usually have all-board GTG's - we usually just break off into individual city GTG's. So this was our first one - and it was a great one to start off with!

So we Albany girls carpooled:

Two*True and Abba916:




Mrobin73 and LadyRed7




It took a little over 2 hours to get out there - and thank you to Lulu (female version of Mrobin's TomTom!) for helping us bypass a traffic accident, a detour, and State Fair traffic! We ended up being about 30 mins late due to all the alternate directions we had to take, but we made it!

We all met in Skaneateles at the Sherwood Inn, which is this really cute inn right across from the Lake that is the 2nd longest continuously running inn in the country (since 1800). We met the other girls there, and had a delicious lunch!


Us at the Inn/Restaurant:



After lunch, we went across the street and hopped on the boat for a tour of Skaneateles Lake (one of the Finger Lakes, in NYS) and played with a duck:






And another group picture, this time on the boat.


Front Row (l-r):
Mrsoc, Marcyiam, June4bride2b, Two*True, Mrobin73


Back Row (l-r):
MelissaSue81 (pg mama!), Labbie, Prncsstp, Abba916, Moximissy, Rivierabound, LadyRed7




And another - look at how awesomely blue/green that water was (Skaneateles Lake is the 2nd cleanest lake in the country - and the water is like the Caribbean - so blue/green, and beautiful)!!



And a couple other views from the boat (although seriously not doing the water color justice! ha):






After the boat tour, we did some shopping around town:




And took another group picture at the gazebo:




On the way to the GTG, we saw field upon field of Sunflowers, but, on the way home, we ended up accidentally going the wrong way back (thanks Lulu!) and since we couldn't take pictures of us frolicking in the sunflowers, we ended up pulling over in the middle of the Thruway interstate (yikes!) on the way home and taking pictures of us in one of the many cornfields - and losing my shoe in the mud!

My shoe was so stuck in the mud, I couldn't even find it at first - gross, but funny!

And now LadyRed7's turn to get muddy (and for me to rinse off my shoe)

OMG, it was so funny - such a good laugh!

It was so much fun and all the ladies were great - we look forward to doing another one, soon! Thanks for the great time, ladies!

I'm Triggered!

I officially triggered with the Ovidrel injection tonight at 10:30 pm. so that means in about 36 hours I'll have my egg retrieval. We are to be there for the ER at 10:00 Monday morning - can't wait! I just really hope a few of the others have caught up and things look good and they get a decent number that fertilize. Pretty please!

Also, the GTG today was great! Perfect weather, great company, and a lot of fun! We took lots of pics, so once I get my downloaded and some from the other girls, I'll post a few. Talk to you soon!

Nestie GTG

Hey everyone! I'm off to meet my carpool for our big Nestie GTG. Hope everyone has a great day!

Follie Check #3 - Trigger tomorrow, Weekend Plans

Six. That's it. That's all the measurable eggs that I have. WTF? Leftie is doing ok and has grown them well, but righty has basically done nothing. Still. Here are my numbers from today's u/s:

Leftie:
20.7
18.9
18.5
18.5
17.8

Rightie:
12.2

Pretty pathetic, eh? This is even worse than last time in a way - fewer measurable eggs. But, at least it looks like there will be at least 5 good mature (hopefully!) eggs come Monday at the retrieval (only had 4 mature last time). And you know what's funny? It's the sad little Rightie that I feel the most - go figure. I will cross my fingers that the one on Rightie catches up, but I seriously doubt it. So it's looking like we'll end up with just a few embies again this time and none for freeze.

So let's hope this one works!

OK, here's my protocol for the next few days:

Tonight: no change - 150 iu Follistim, 5 iu Lupron
Tomorrow: Trigger (Ovidrel) at 10:30 pm, no Follistim or Lupron
Sunday: no injections! No baby aspirin. No food/beverage after midnight
Monday: ER at 10:00 am
Thursday: potential ET

It's actually pretty good that I won't be doing stims tomorrow night because I am going to an Upstate NY Nestie get-together and I don't want to worry about making it back into town in time or having to lug them around with me all day in a cooler! lol

I'm actually looking forward to the GTG - I've been chatting with these girls from all over the state for a while now and we finally get to meet! I've gone to some local Nestie GTG's and a few of us are carpooling over together, but meeting some of the others from Upstate NY should be fun. We are going to the Finger Lakes area - having lunch and then going on a boat cruise. Ooh, gotta remember my camera!

I'm also officially on vacation until September 2nd - yay for me! We were planning on going north to the Adirondacks to my parents' house and then to hop over and see my sister/nephew, but now that we have to go to Syracuse on Monday and Thursday, it wouldn't make any sense to to go - too much driving in very opposite directions lol Oh well - so is the way with all of our vaca plans this year, but baby comes first!

Hope you all of you are doing well - have any plans for the weekend?

Day 8 of Stims

Nothing too big to report. Still just chugging along. The follie check on Wednesday was interesting. There were about 10 or so follies, but only 5 measureable (I had 10 measurable by this point last cycle). Here are the sizes:

Left:
10.5
10.9
11.7
12.0

Right:
9.3

When I left the office that day she checked Monday's E2 (Estridiol) level and based on those and how my follies were doing, she upped me to 225 iu of Follistim. But, before the day was out, I got a call that based on my E2 level from that day, they were bumping me back down to 150. Oh well. I was honestly looking forward to the higher level in hopes of having more measurable follies for tomorrow's appointment, but I'll keep to the 150 iu for now.

I guess we'll just do slow and steady wins the race, right? And better quality rather than quantity? Oh well - I guess we'll see how tomorrow's u/s goes to see if we are still scheduled for Monday for the ER or not. I am just really hoping for more than 4 mature eggs - that sucked hard last cycle. Fingers crossed!

Day 6 of Stims, My Cat, and the Olympics

Today is day 6 of stims and tonights Lupron shot hurt like crazy! I got more Lupron at Monday's ultrasound appointment and the needle I used tonight from the Lupron kit hurt like crazy! Don't know why, but it went in hard - ouch! Follistim pen was once again, no pain at all. Hope the rest of the needles won't hurt like tonights!

So my first ultrasound on Monday and saw a decent amount of follies. Only one was measurable at Monday's appointment, but based on the fact that I could start feeling my ovaries today (and tons of EWCM!), I should have some more to measure during my appointment tomorrow (Wednesday).

Have been getting a lot of headaches and have been just so tired lately. Don't know if it's the Lupron or my lack of drinking water, crappy eating and staying up late to watch the Olympics. Probably both!

Speaking of Olympics, I'm watching right now. It's currently the Women's Gymnastics - Balance Beam event final. I already know who wins, but it's still exciting to watch. Despite all the talk out there, especially around gymnastics, the Olympics have been fun to watch. Michael Phelps, the women's beach volleyball, Shawn Johnson and Nastia Liukin for gymnastics, etc... I've even found myself enjoying diving (even synchronized diving!) and want to watch the Rhythmic gymnastics on Friday. Go USA!

I guess my last update is on my cat. I know some of you have asked, and I thank you for that. There really isn't much of a positive update. He still refuses to eat on his own and shows no interest. Therefore we still have to force-feed him with the syringe. Which he hates. It absolutely breaks my heart every time I have to do that. He now basically fears when I approach him. He used to love it knowing he's get a nice scratch - not being tortured with food and then me having to wipe his face because of the food that doesn't make it into his mouth. So now he anticipates it every time he sees me go near him and starts to freak out most of the time. I made DH do it today for most of the feedings because I couldn't bear to do that to him again.

But if we don't do that, he will continue to just get worse. As it is, even when we do manage to get his pill and food down his throat, he throws it up about 50% of the time. It just makes me so sad. He's just continuing to get worse. We are beginning to think to ourselves that he may not live that much longer. And because of that, we've even begun letting him go outside on his own. He might as well enjoy however much time he has left, you know? So he has free reign of the outdoors again and can do what he loves best - hanging out in our neighbor's yard filled with flowers, and plants, a few gardens, and a fish pond. He's in heaven! And we know for a fact he's not going hear the road again - he's scared of it! Poor guy (although that does make me happy!). Some people may criticize us for letting him back out where he could get hurt, etc... Where he got hurt the first time. But we don't care - we just want him to be happy considering his current circumstances, and that is what does it. So outside he goes during the day, and snuggling inside at night with us! We love you Riley!

Yup, I'm a loser

I haven't updated in a while, but I will, I promise. I have some weekend updates and pictures as well as IVF and kitty updates. Hopefully I'll get to it tonight. Hope you're all doing well!

Playing Hostess!

We have house guests this weekend! DH's sister and her two girls, 6 and 8, are here for the weekend. They took the train in from Rochester and we picked them around 1:00 pm yesterday. So far, it has been a lot of fun! Hope you all have a good one, too and I'll try and get pics posted tomorrow!

Meet Landon Forrest!

So, here he is! My brand new nephew, Landon Forrest. His middle name is after our dad - love it! DH and I were thinking of doing the same thing if we have a boy, so now we'll just have to see! ha

He is the cutest thing ever - but then again, what baby isn't! I am proud to have him be the one to make me an aunt for the first time! Tom has nieces and a nephew so I guess they were technically my first, but they are through marriage. Not the same, right?! lol

My sister was due on 8/25 so the little guy came about 2.5 weeks early, but he is doing just fine - here are the details of the big day:

Thursday:

10:30 pm - water broke, went to hospital to confirm and they sent her home until her contractions were 3-4 minutes apart (she lives about 15 mins from hospital).

Friday:

8:30 am - called b/c contractions were about 4 minutes apart

9:30 am - checked into hospital, contractions were about 3.5 minutes apart

2:42 pm - Landon Forrest was born!

Date: 08/08/08

Time: 2:42 pm

Height: 19"

Weight: 6 lbs 8 oz

And, I know this sounds crazy, but look at the number of 8's up there:

Date: 3

Time: 1 (2 + 4 + 2 = 8)

Weight: 1

Room: 1 (born in room #8!)

Too bad he wasn't 1 inch shorter, eh? ;-) He's going to be one lucky baby!

I don't have all the details from the day since we were traveling up there during it all, but she made it through the process without any drugs/epidurals and only needed to push 3 times and he was here! She said there was a moment where she asked them to check her because she was seriously contemplating the drugs because it was so hard, but she said they sidetracked her so her mind was off of it for a bit and she ended up delivering before they could do it later! Toward the end, she spent time in the shower and then the tub, where she ended up actually delivering him. She said that all of the doctors actually just left the room after side tracking her and then aa short while later Travis saw the head - oops! Needless to say, they all came back in and Landon was here! And she didn't even need pain meds after - go figure!

I really hope that when it's finally my turn, it works out similarly for me!

I was really upset with myself that I missed the actual birth and that we didn't leave earlier, but I am happy that my mom was able to make it over there in time. Who would have guessed her first baby would come so quickly! I am just so proud of her! And Travis is such a proud dad, it's so awesome to see. And this is the first grandchild for my parents (9th for Travis' parents) - and they are just so happy (although my dad doesn't show emotion, so you'd never know it haha).

OK, now that I've bored you with the details, here are some more pictures of the new proud mommy and daddy, and little Landon!

Jamie, Travis and Landon - just a few hours after he was born:

Travis and Landon:

Little Landon swaddled up like a burrito!:

Landon - kinda looks like he's smiling! (and yes, I know he's not haha):

Me and my new nephew!

DH and Landon:

He is just going to be a great dad when we have ours! Even though he did want to go so see the baby, the weekend was a bit rough for him, understandably so. I felt so bad, but he did a really good job of not letting Jamie, Travis, or the family see. I'm so sorry Tom - and thank you for being you - I love you so much! We WILL have our own baby and I cannot wait to see you hold him!

My Dad and Landon (he was so scared he was going to squeeze him too hard!):

There are not pictures right now of my mom holding him - she was taking too many pictures!

Travis' mom and Landon:

Everyone! The new parents, Landon, DH and both sets of grandparents!

And, to finish it all off, a quick video I took - Landon loves to squeek and grunt while sleeping, so I had to capture it!

He is now officially 6 days old!

I'm officially an Aunt!

We're back and it was a great weekend. It has been a busy day at work so I will try to post more tonight or tomorrow. As an fyi, it will have some IVF info in it, but it will be mostly about my new nephew and pictures of the little guy! Just wanted to let you know in case you didn't want to read that.

Hope you all had a great weekend!

My Sister's in Labor!

Well - on her way at least! She called us last night around 10 letting us know that her water broke - can you believe it? So much for my due date guess of 8/22 or the original EDD of 8/25! lol We live about 3.5 - 4 hours away so she (or someone else later) will keep us posted so we'll know when we should head up to go be there. They went in to confirm it was her water breaking (although she had no doubt!) and they did and then sent her home to rest and sleep until the contractions start and get to be about 3-4 minutes apart. So, she called this morning around 8:00 letting us know that her they are now about 4 minutes apart and are lasting for about 1 minute each. So she is going to call her doctor and probably head in.

Guess that means we should probably start packing and figure out when we are going to head up. Who knows if she will take forever to progress or if it'll be quick! Sucks not living close in a lot of situations, but this one is worse. I could be living in Australia with my youngest sister - there's no WAY she'll be here. :-( Boooo....

Oh - and I need to remember to bring my Lupron. And call the RE in case I need to start Stims while I'm gone. Maybe they can give them to me just in case. and the biggest issue - what to do with the cat. Obviously can't leave him here - no meds, no food - not a good situation. We could take an different route up and drop him off at my parents house, but who knows how long we'll be in Burlington with my sister and Riley at my parents' house back in NYS. So maybe we will need to board him at the vet? Well that just makes me sad. Him being stuck in his little "cage" all day, scared and alone. Reminding him of all the time he's already spent there since his accident. He used to not mind going - now - not a fan and I don't blame him. Poor guy!

OK - guess I'll go pack and get ready and figure out what we're going to do so that when it's time, we can just go! Hopefully I'll have some good pictures when I get back on here!

I'm Jealous

It's official and I'll admit it. Most of the time, when I find out someone in real life is pregnant, it really doesn't bother me too much. Yes, I was upset and I cried when I found out my sister was pregnant. But that was for very different reasons. I was the oldest. I got married first. I should have the first grandchild. It was a different kind of jealousy. It wasn't because I wasn't/couldn't get pregnant. I don't know how to explain it - it's just not the same kind of thing - it was more of a jealous, I'm the big sister and married, I should be pregnant first, not you, kind of big sister petty jealousy. Does that make sense? But, like I said, I quickly got over that and I'm so excited to see that little guy any day now!

But, back to why my jealousy has kicked in. One that some of you may, unfortunately, be familiar with. One of my cousins is pregnant. She's already got one baby, no big deal, that one didn't bother me. But recently my mom told me she was talking to my aunt and she said that my cousin and her husband were going to try to have a baby when her husband came back into port (he's in the Navy and is often gone 6 months at a time on a submarine). He came home in June and I found out last week that she's pregnant. Already. After just one try. That's all it took. Just like that.

Don't get me wrong - I'm happy for them. Honestly Especially since he is only home for 6 months before he ships out again for another 6 months under the water. So he won't be there when she gives birth which would suck. But I think it just hit me extra hard this time because I'm about to start my 2nd IVF cycle in hopes of being as lucky as her to be pregnant. I just am not as naive as I was before that this will work and I'll be pregnant. Plus, I admit it, it's the first time really that it made me jealous that someone I know could be pregnant so easily - like it should happen for everyone.

I know, this is nothing new for many of my IF ladies. Usually I can brush off how I feel when I find out someone is pregnant, but this one was just harder. Maybe it's because I actually know it was only one cycle. Super easy. For others, I honestly do not know how many cycles it was. Who knows - either way, I'm jealous and just need to shake it off.

OK, I think I'm done feeling sorry for myself. And rambling. It's not a new feeling to many and I know I am very lucky that I don't have too many pregnant people in my real life. So, now I am just going to focus on this cycle and do my best to get this cycle to work!

Spotting

So I started spotting last night and some today. I know the RE said my lining still had a little bit left to go, but if this spotting is any indication, hopefully I'll get what may resemble a period shortly and get started on the stims!

First shot of Lupron was last night for this round - pretty uneventful, but still excited that we have finally started the injections. I love when we get to this point and the action finally starts. Can't wait!

My Date with the Wand

...went well! The cyst is gone, so I am off BCP and am starting my first Lupron injection (10 iu) for IVF#2 tonight - yay! Shhh.... I actually stopped taking the BCP Sunday night since I ran out of active pills - I didn't want to have to buy a whole new pack for potentially just one more day! haha

So now I just need to wait for my period to start - which should hopefully be soon since I am off the BCP and then can start my stims.

Before I left, I asked them about my protocol for this round. The nurse didn't know what it was yet, but I expressed my concern about it being the same as last time as they only ended up retrieving 10 eggs - and out of those 10, only 4 were mature Not acceptable in my opinion. Thankfully 3 of them fertilized! She mentioned they may up my Follistim dosage, but she wasn't sure and that she'd make a note in my file about it.

If they keep me at 150 iu this time, I will question it and track my own progress. And if it's progressing the same as last time, I'll bring up the possibility of upping the dosage or stimming longer. Four eggs just isn't acceptable to me and I don't like those odds. Less than 50% of the actual eggs and an even lesser percentage of the actual number of follies that I had.

So, I guess that's it. I paid for my portion of the cycle before I left - I'm got approved for grant again this round and they don't have you pay your small fortune until you actually get approved to start the Lupron. So, let's hope this one is it - because our savings account is pretty much empty after this payment and we'll need time to build it back up again if we have to go for #3. Yikes!

On an unrelated note, I have to call the vet today to figure out next steps for the cat. He now has zero interest in food (he did before, even if just a little), so we've been force-feeding him iwth the syringes now 100%. So that makes us incredibly sad - hopefully the vet will have some good next steps. And I honestly hate to say this, but I really hope the next steps won't cost too much. After paying for this round of IVF, we just don't have the money. But, we'll do what we have to do, I guess. It just breaks my heart to see him this way.

Other than that, all is well. NOTE - what I am about to type mentions another person's pregnancy. If you don't want to read it, I would stop reading here.

I haven't typed really much about my sister's pregnancy on here because I know a lot of IF girls read this and I don't want to upset them. Although I was really sad when I first found out she was pregnant (it was a surprise pregnancy), I have gotten over that and I just can't wait for that little guy to arrive! I am just so excited for her and her Fiance! My sister has officially passed her 37 week mark so her baby is "officially" full term - yay! She is due on the 25th, but we've all taken bets on when he will come and I picked the 22nd. She and I were both born on the 22nd (of different months) and my other sister was born on the 21st of this month. So I thought it would be cool to have another 22nd birthday. They haven't told us the name yet, so I'm curious to find out what it is. It'll be nice to have a little nephew running around, although we won't get to see him a whole bunch since they live abuot 3.5 hours away. But, DH and I will do our best to get up there when she goes into labor. Can't wait!

OK, guess that's it - a lot was covered in this post! haha I hope all is well with all of you and I'll "talk" to you later!

Tomorrow = Go/No Go

So tomorrow I go back to the RE to see how the cyst is looking and if we can move forward with the Lupron shots for IVF#2 or if we have to wait. I haven't really been feeling any pain from it, so here's to hoping it's gone - or at least gone enough to move forward!

Hike + Picnic + Cake + Drive-In = Perfect Day!

Yesterday was an awesome day. We slept in a bit and then ate a late breakfast. The weather was gorgeous out so we played outside a bit with the cat and then got ready for our hike. Hike was nice - a good work out, time with DH, and just nice and quiet hiking up through the trees.

After the hike, we went to one of the picnic areas - yum! We made sandwiches, had the yummy spicy pasta salad I made the night before and some fruit. And, for dessert, I surprised him with some cake from our wedding cake top! Since we didn't get to eat any of it on our actually anniversary, I thought this would be a nice surprise. Our cake was delicious and each layer was different. Our topper was chocolate chip pound cake (or maybe it was yellow cake?). It looks like crap here, but go figure - it thawed out well and was as delicious and tasty as on our wedding day!

After that, we went to one of the look out areas and took some pictures and then drove home. Took a nap, played with the cat, gave him all his meds, food, etc... and then got ready for the Drive-in!

We love going to the drive-in. We have about 3 or so within 30 minutes. It's only $7-$8 to go and you get to see two current-run movies. Can't beat that! The drive-in we went to has 2 screens and were showing Mama Mia and The Mummy on one and The Dark Night and Stepbrothers. We chose the Dark Night and Stepbrothers screen. The Dark Night was really good although on the long side. Stepbrothers was good, although by the time The Dark Night was over we were a bit tired. We laughed a lot, but recommend it more as a rental - and with a few drinks while you do to make it even funnier!

Today we're just hanging out. Weather's kinda crappy - period of rain, then sun, then rain, and the hail is coming soon. So it's a good day to just sleep in, hang out, sleep in, read, clean, watch Lifetime movies, etc... Good times!